Decide

A couple years ago, while attending a conference for those in Christian ministry, I attended a workshop on avoiding burnout. Within the previous year or two, I’d come across colleagues in the ministry who shared their experience of being burned out, and they were men in the same stage of life as I. So, realizing the potential vulnerability, and feeling in a bit of the doldrums myself, I thought the session might prove helpful. And indeed it was.

The presenter was chosen for this topic because of his own experience of burnout. He described hitting the wall and being completely unable to function in his responsibility. It took him a considerable amount of time to heal and restore what had been “burned up.” In describing his recovery period, one of the things he discovered was he’d been investing his life but finding no gain.

As he proceeded to explain his condition, he mentioned a book that didn’t merely enlighten him. It revolutionized his entire approach to work and its relationship to life in general. That book was Decide: Work Smarter, Reduce Your Stress, and Lead by Example by Steve McClatchy. Before the workshop was over, I’d ordered the book and it was waiting for me when I got home.

There’s far more in Decide than I can cover in this brief musing, so I’ll share just the main idea that struck me and helped the formerly burned-out workshop presenter.

In the Introduction, McClatchy confronted me with a barrage of self-assessment questions (p. 3):

• How do you feel about the big decisions you’ve made so far?
• What about the everyday choices that affect your daily life?
• Does your life feel balanced?
• Do you have enough time to get to the important things, or are you always running in place trying to keep up?
• Do you know how to progress from managing to leading?
• Are you fully engaged in your career and your goals?
• Do you find ways to improve your business and your life while still managing and maintaining the daily business of just being you?

Those kinds of questions can lead to a good bit of time spent on pondering and analyzing. More likely, though, the intention is to generate a simple gut reaction—you instinctively know the answers; your brain responds before you consciously think it through. I fairly quickly turned the page, challenged to read on.

Another question piqued my interest: “Which of the many things that we do each day actually move us forward, and which just keep us running in place?” (p. 7)

This led to a chapter-length discussion of the two types of human motivation. All the things we do each day are motivated either “to move toward Gain, or to Prevent Pain.” In other words, you’re motivated either “to move toward something you want (Gain), or to prevent the loss of something you have (Prevent Pain).” (p. 7) Sometimes, both motivations are involved in a single decision, but one of the two dominates.

To clarify further between the two forms of motivation, McClatchy suggests that when motivated by Gain, I’m concerned with something I want or desire in life. [Please note: while this sounds terribly selfish, it doesn’t have to be, and for the Christian won’t be.] The end result of a Gain-motivated decision/action is that my life improves in some way and it moves me forward.

Perhaps an example is in order. Every day I face the decision of getting exercise. That’s not in my job description, but it is something I want to do. Getting out for a two-mile walk or going to the Y is a Gain-motivated decision. I know I’ll feel better in the long run and will maintain health, strength, and endurance in my life. And yet the effect is, I hope, for the benefit of others as well: my wife, children, grandchildren, people I serve in the church, etc.

Prevent-Pain motivated decisions, by contrast, are those things that on some level I have to do. As McClatchy defines it, a Prevent Pain task “is any task or activity that, if neglected, someone else will eventually bring to your attention.” (p. 10) For example, if I don’t make my car payment on January 2, the bank is going to let me know, and I’ll feel the sting of a late fee. If I don’t study to prepare my sermons, concerned parishioners will let me know somehow, and it won’t feel good.

From this distinction between Gain and Prevent Pain motivations, the author explains the resulting difference between management and leadership. Management, he suggests, is faithfully carrying out all the requisite Prevent Pain tasks that essentially maintain things. Leadership, on the other hand, employs Gain tasks, thereby “moving things forward from where they are today,” or improvement.

Applying all of this to one’s personal life, he writes,

“Doing what we have to do each day to maintain our lives is management. This is not what defines us as individuals; rather, it is what makes us the same as everyone else. Personal leadership is doing what we don’t have to do to lead ourselves forward and grow each day. This is where we get our self-identity and what differentiates us from others.”

In the third chapter—the last one I’ll discuss—McClatchy demonstrates the critical role that Gain tasks have in helping us avoid burnout and develop a sense of balance in our lives. To be clear, “balance” doesn’t mean there’s a somewhat equal distribution of time or resources to the different areas of life and its responsibilities. “Balance,” he clarifies, “is a feeling you get when you are satisfied with where you are and where you are going in life.” (p. 30) I found that definition helpful.

And then this, too:

“There is always opportunity for improvement, ingenuity, new adventure, and new growth, both personally and professionally. The best way to combat burnout and stress—and achieve a feeling that your life is balanced between what you have to do and what makes you feel alive—is to continually seek improvement in some area of your life.” (p. 31)

One of the reasons for this, he explains, is that “Unless we are constantly working toward improving some area of life, we will be focused on the parts of life that naturally get worse over time. This can cause stress, burnout, resentment, regret, and depression…the despairing feeling that yesterday was better than today.” (p. 32)

It’s also important to understand that McClatchy isn’t arguing for a negative, disdainful attitude toward Prevent Pain tasks. Instead, he wants us to see that both are essential for a sense of well-being. As he says,

“The feeling of balance comes when you have done what you had to do to maintain life and Prevent Pain plus you have done something you didn’t have to do to move life forward a little today.” (p. 33)

And,

“We don’t need to balance work and life; work is part of life. We need to balance surviving today with progressing toward a better tomorrow.” (p. 34)

For my part, given the context of the workshop I attended on avoiding burnout, this statement resonated:

“Moving toward something meaningful that will improve life for you, your team at work, your organization, your family, and so on is what makes depression, burnout, and stress fade away and allows balance and satisfaction to take over.” (p. 34)

The rest of Decide provides some very practical advice regarding goal setting, task prioritization, planning, time management, managing interruptions. I found his advice to be a helpful complement to that offered in Do More Better and Your Best Year Ever. 

Now if I could only better implement what I know will be helpful! Well, at least I’ve gained a bit on where I was three years ago.

Moving forward!