43 Miles…43 Years

The idea came eleven years ago, and—believe it or not—it didn’t come from me!

In the middle of August 2012, my wife and I had a short overnight getaway in Chicago to celebrate our 32^nd anniversary. The weather forecast was ideal, so we took our bikes to ride along the Chicago Lakefront Trail—a scenic recreation trail hugging the shoreline of Lake Michigan.

We started out mid-morning from just north of Navy Pier, riding south toward McCormick Place. We had no particular goal in mind, other than just to enjoy a day of bike riding. Tracking our progress on my Garmin, we rode a bit more than 15 miles before turning around. On the way back, we stopped at Navy Pier, locked the bikes, got a late lunch, and strolled around the pier.

After another 45 minutes or so, we reached our starting point, logging a total of 31 miles for the day.

Loaded the bikes back on the car and headed west toward home.

“How far did you say we rode?” Chris asked.

“31 miles”

“Really? You realize,” she said, “if we had gone just one more mile, we would’ve ridden one mile for every year we’ve been married!”

Then came her idea.

“We should do that!” she exclaimed.

“We should start a tradition around our anniversary of riding a mile for every year we’ve been married!”

And so it began.

In 2013, we rode 33 miles on the Fox River Trail. Back to the Chicago Lakefront Trail in 2014 and 2015 for 34 and 35 miles respectively.

And so on.

Most of our rides have been on either the Fox River or Chicago Lakefront trails, with a few notable exceptions.

Our ride came late in 2020 (COVID messed up a lot of things!). In October, on our way back from a vacation in Florida, we stopped in Atlanta to ride the Silver Comet Trail—a 61-mile railtrail that begins just outside the city and runs west to the Alabama border.

We planned to ride 20 miles and turn around. The first 35 of the necessary 40 miles were great.

Until a thunderstorm came up and torrential rain poured down! We rode as fast as we could the last 3 or 4 miles and got totally drenched from head to toe.

2023

This year we opted for a trail we’ve taken for shorter rides—the Great River Trail that starts in Rock Island, IL and follows the Mississippi River for 62 miles before ending in Savanna. Our goal was to ride for 21 ½ miles before turning around.

For late August, the weather was ideal. Warm and sunny enough to get sunburned(!), but cool enough to avoid heat exhaustion.

For the most part, the scenery along Great River Trail—at least the section we rode on—is pretty nice. After all, for much of it, you’re riding on the banks of the Mississippi! And compared to other bike trails we have been on—like the Fox River Trail—the section we rode is smooth pavement with no significant hills to climb.

But it’s not all pretty.

Some of the trail runs through industrial sites. Along a brief section, the river is on one side and an abandoned industrial site on the other—old concrete pads surrounded by an overgrowth of weeds, rusted steel, and chain-link security fencing. Just past this area, the trail skirts a wastewater treatment plant. Hopefully, the prevailing wind is coming from the west when you pass. Not pleasant.

Despite the few unpleasant spots along the way, there are more than enough positives to make it all worthwhile. We plan to ride it again…next time covering 45, 46, 47 miles? In the end, we actually rode a little over 44 miles—a mile more than we needed!

43 miles for 43 years. To some, that’s a long way…and a long time!

But the 43 miles is really a fairly appropriate metaphor for the 43 years, if you think about it.

A good bit of planning goes into the day’s ride—have to set the time aside well in advance, but be flexible for any last-minute “surprises” that come up. The closer the day gets, the more excitement builds—and maybe a little bit of trepidation. Just how hard will this be???

Finally reach the trailhead, get the bikes off the rack, and hop on for the ride—a commitment to do this, cover every mile, take no shortcuts.

The journey begins with great enthusiasm. The first few miles are a breeze, getting into a rhythm, just enjoying the ride. After those first miles, you start paying more attention to them, marking off key markers—10 miles…15…20…25….

At times, you cruise along smoothly, breathing easily, enjoying the moment, taking in the scenery.

At times, it’s a struggle. Put your head down, drop to a lower gear, huff and puff uphill—some hills so long you wonder if you’ll ever reach the crest.

Then the downhill coast—relief, wind blowing through your hair, recuperation…preparation for the next challenge?

At times, looking around delights the senses. The colors, the scenery, even the fragrances fill the heart with joy and gratitude for this journey.

Then you pass the wastewater treatment plant. Or an unsightly rusting factory. Or a trash dump. You hold your nose, focus on the trail, and ride on.

At times, a sharp pain strikes or a dull ache grows in intensity. Need to take a short break, regroup, and then carry on.

Weariness, thirst, and hunger can slow you down. We discovered the value of stopping every hour, get off the bikes, rest the legs and back, drink well, eat a snack—replenish the body. Always with the purpose of a refreshed return to the ride.

Most of the time, you’re simply riding alongside each other, quietly enjoying the ride and each other’s company. Nothing overly exciting…nothing troubling or concerning…just doing this together.

And though it’s not necessarily easier, since every leg of the journey has its own challenges, the longer you go your gratitude grows for the opportunity to do this together. And the excitement and sense of satisfaction builds in those latter miles—you’re doing this!

You will make it together!

When God brought Eve to Adam and performed that first “wedding ceremony” in the Garden of Eden, His design was for a long journey together. Clearly, they had some steep hills to climb—remember how Adam started the blame game? And life outside of Eden was far from idyllic! They endured their share of pain—one of their sons murdered the other! They experienced corresponding joy—Seth was born.

Yet they stayed on the trail for the long haul. We don’t know how long Eve lived, but Adam reached the ripe old age of 930 years. His only bride rode with him all along life’s journey.

Interestingly, you can look at any married couple in the Scriptures and you’ll see the metaphor played out. Longevity, hardship, pain, pleasure, delight, disappointment, difficulty. Moments of extreme heartache, others of extreme euphoria. But journeying on. None of them perfectly, but journeying on.

At some point after our ride, we were sharing the experience with someone much younger, remarking that the 43 miles represented our number of years together. The response was typical: “Wow! 43 years! That’s a long time!”

They seemed amazed that a couple could stay married for so long. Like, how on earth can you do that?

Part of it is commitment, like, “We’re gonna ride this trail no matter what!”

Isn’t that the essence of what’s recited at the marriage altar:

I take you…to have and to hold from this day forward…for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health; to love and to cherish til death do us part.

Why is it so important to keep this commitment/vow/covenant in mind when there’s a long, steep, agonizing hill to climb?

Well, for one thing, because of this:

Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven and you are on earth. Therefore let your words be few.… When you vow a vow to God, do not delay paying it, for he has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you vow.

– Ecclesiastes 5:2–4 (ESV)

Stay on the saddle…keep pedaling forward…pedal through it.

Commitment is vital. So too is heeding the basic, foundational exhortations to husbands and wives:

…let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

– Ephesians 5:33

All the ups and downs, difficulties and heartaches, pain and sorrow—times of putting your head down, dropping down into first, gritting your teeth, and just pedaling on are bearable when a wife knows that deep down her husband loves her…and a husband knows that deep down his wife respects him. A couple so bound together can get through anything.

For 43 years and many more to come!